Not Everything is As It Seems

(15 minute read)

As a 2x Nationally Certified Personal Trainer I know how to workout to get results and build programs for people BUT….Let me give you a little insight. Let me walk you down what that looks like for my own personal journey, and tell you what that means for you!

Over the past two years I was really skeptical of Crossfit and these super dangerous Olympic lifting styles. However, as the trends continued on I decided rather than maintain my pessimistic view I would try it out. I am always looking for ways to grow, learn and try out new things so why not. Oylmpic lifting was something I didn’t know much about and could use enhancement on.

For those who do not know what Crossfit or Olympic lifting is just imagine some with a giant barbell and ton of weights toss weight in the air and moving it around in ways that can at first glance be super intimidating and look like something that takes years of practice to master. Want some advice on where to start? Use a PVC pipe or a broom stick (no really, I am being serious) and try the same movements so you can you learn the proper mechanics before you go mastering lifts!

In an effort to avoid the bunny trail I am about to go down lets get back to the point.

It to me some time before I found a Crossfit gym I felt aligned enough to join. I needed one that I did not feel the workouts were about pounding on my joints and slinging weight around carelessly. Now based on my experience as a professional in this field I also felt assured that I knew proper body mechanics and was not going to do anything to subject myself to injury.

I have been lifting weights for over 10 years now which in this modern age is a LONG TIME, and in that time I have NEVER sustained an injury. THAT IS SOMETHING TO BE PROUD OF!

Not to mention, I have no problem standing my ground when it comes to a movement I know is improper. I also have no problem kindly telling someone why, so while new to this style of workout I was someone prepared.

So anywayyyyyy….. I did join a Crossfit gym for a little bit shy of 2 years, I saw great results but started to get board and felt like I no longer had a place of growth. Sure you can always add more weight, enhance a movement or grow in certain lifts. I simply put lost my sense of connection with the people there in a way. That season of my life no longer felt appropriate. I think a lot of that had to do with the fact that the coaches who I was used to were no longer coaching and rather members who I was working out with were now becoming coaches.

I know, I know I should be happy for them right, well I am but I am also super selfish about my workouts and no longer saw the value in my $140 a month membership for what I called a “baby coach” who last week was taking the same class as me.

Judge as you may, I felt it time to move on. Not to mention my husband got me an entire Crossfit set up at home, something a personal trainer can only dream of! I told myself I would go back from time to time to “check in” but I already knew what that meant. I was not going to go who was I kidding. I am the worlds Biggest penny pincher so why would I pay a $20 drop in fee to “check in”? Keep reading.


So I started doing the workouts at home and realized I was actually able to push myself more than ever before. What was nice about my membership at the Crossfit gym was my ability to see everyone’s scores. I am VERY competitive by nature so I always push to be 1st. This is a horrible way to workout as it is super egocentric but it is true about me. I love to be first! What is that cliche saying in that one movie, “If your not first your last”.

Now for the record there is a difference in being first and “sandbagging” and entire workout. Sandbagging is using a much lighter weight in order to “come in 1st” verse using the appropriate weight for your body. For example if the movement is pull ups and your doing a fully assisted pull up when you can knock out 20 pull ups in a row your sandbagging. Yeah you might come in 1st but not really.

I am not talking about that hear. I am saying I would balls to the wall clear the scoreboard. Sooooo I moved on.

I started cultivating my own workouts feeling like superwomen and went on to be the next Team USA Athlete. NO, NO, that is not how this story goes.

I fell into my “old habits” quick, you see I didn’t realize I thrived off of the idea that other people are watching me. Just the shire idea that someone was paying attention to the amount of work I may or may not had been putting in was enough to keep me in the right head space.

It is the same concept as working with me as your online trainer you know that your checking in with me next week, you know I am going to ask about x,y,z so your not going to “sandbag” it just to wine to me that your not seeing results. RIGHT? Can I be honest… no one cares what you do in your workout or at the gym who is not your personal trainer or coach. It was just this idea that they could see me and knew what I was doing, they could “tell” if my weight was to easy or if I say and played on my phone the entire time. To me “they knew” and that was enough.

HOWEVER, we are getting a little ahead of ourselves here. I might know that about myself but at this point I was still working out at home, feeling like superwomen.

So that entire idea is very much psychological … if I pretend that someone was watching me I did great. When I lost a way to compare myself to others on the score board I started in my old routines. I no longer had a way to be first or see my results. I even tried the whole acountablilty partner things and it failed person after person, time and time again. It was not that these acountability partners didn’t care it was more that I had more to offer then they could offer me . I knew deep down what my problem was but I also was not ready to fix it.

I had convinced myself I should try what worked before. I know none of you have ever done that right?

So I did just that I started each workout by running 1 mile, then I would lift and I did not want to exceed 30 mins in total so I worked my butt off someday’s and then added in a run as bonus others. Essentially I did a mix of Running, lifting, HIIT, Crossfit, whatever I felt like, and lost a sense of my goals.

I should be seeing results right, I mean I was enjoying my new workout plans more than ever before, I felt good, I was done in 30-45mins and I could check that box of working out. I am a 2x Nationally Certified Trainer, I can make a workout that gets results.

Let’s move this story along, fast forward 6 months and I started to feel gross and get fed up with where I was in my fitness journey. As a personal trainer I have a certain pressure to maintain my figure. To feel good, and look the part right?

I also teach people (especially women) how to Eat cake and lose weight! It is a sustainable approach to weight loss. That means you can eat the foods you love do not have to spend hours in the gym and you will get the results you want.

Looking to prove me wrong on this? Make sure to read last weeks blog, and follow this link. I love a challenge, remember! Quick side note, I offer a money back incentive, if you do not see the results and you follow my programming I give you ALLLLLLL of your money back.

So, what happened? My husband wanted to join our local gym so we did. I joined to support him and thought what the heck I will go I mean I do not have all of that equipment at home and quite frankly I missed a lot of it. This could be fun!

The strangest thing happened to me. Me the confident, personal trainer! The weight loss experet, the formerly obease person. ME!


It was a new environment, somewhere I had never set foot in let alone new what to expect. I was so nervious the first time y’all I sat in the parking lot for over and hour before I could go in.


That is right, over and hour before could go in! What happened? I went in because, scew that voice inside my head, screw that little evil crap that trys to drag me down in a place of darkness and insecurity. I held my head high, tied my ponytail tighter and faked it until I made it.

I decided to put my big girl pants on and went in. I didn’t go in and hide on the cardio machine for an hour like the stereotypical women. I did what I had planned in my mind and I did it with the full rack of confidence. Why?

The only way to grow is to overcome fear, to set aside doubt and just go for it. I mean what is the worst case scenario I could come up with would happen? I would pass out in the gym and need 911? Let’s think logically about that for a second.

Exactly, I got over myself limiting thoughts and went in. Fast forward some more, and I started to become obsessed. I started to feel great! I started to gain more confidence, and no I am not talking over months. I am talking over days.

I knew what I had to do, I went in with confidence, I surprised myself with how strong I was and my ability to crush the workouts. I was reminded of how great of a trainer I am. People would come up to me and ask me questions, ask me for help in my plain jane cloths and watch me as I worked out.

Being a women that loves a challange in a workout I quickly started to devlop a healthy relationship with myself. I tracked my weights and workouts like I ask my clients to do and I started to see the positive change.

The entire idea behind finding what works best for you in a workout or fitness journey. My lesson to you is this. Find you motivation, find what gives you that confidence, find what keeps you holding you head height and stick with it.

Do you hold you head high knowing your workout was made by a trainer and is going to get your results verse the 10 reps and 3 sets the other people are doing?

Do you hold your head high because your trainer says eat that Moonpie after your workout if you want the moon pie? Or maybe it is the idea that you get to go to Chick-Fil-A after your workout and you have never done that on a diet before.

Do you enjoy the idea that you can get over the mental barrier of feeling like the “fat girl” in the mirror or the gym? Maybe it’s the idea that you do not have to put up a “fake face” in the gym but actual feel confident rather than put up walls that show that outwardly.

Did you say yes to any or those or find them easy to relate to? Did you know that all of my clients get to say YES to those. My clients say YES to Moonpie’s, and Chick-Fil-A, yes to confidence not fake faces, yes to feeling and looking better, yes to crushing goals!

So remember the point driver home is this, Find you motivation, find what gives you that confidence, find what keeps you holding you head height and stick with it. Maybe your like, “Ashley, I don’t know how to find the motivation, I thought it was to have perfect summer body, or be in shape for my kids.” GIRL I GOT YOU.
Let’s work together to find that reason, my first question to you is this. DIG DEEPER your why is not only from “feelings” 9/10 times it is so much deeper.

Want more help? Use this link and let’s figure that out!

or email me at

Published by 3 Degree Fitness, Eat Cake Lose Weight!

Online Personal Trainer, showing women how to eat cake, lose weight and keep it off!

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